Mugabe Has Some Fun With Tsvangirai
UP THE CREEK WITHOUT A PADDLE: (Canoeing on The Zambezi): The inclusive government does indeed appear to be all at sea right now, with Mugabe sending his own begging mission to The East after Morgan Tsvangirai came back empty-handed from Europe and the USA. The dictator has also been having a bit of fun at the expense of the Prime Minister.
It emerges the Prime Minister has been calling home to speak with Mugabe during his three-week tour of Europe and the United States. I am told the first time it happened, Mugabe told Tsvangirai, "Thank you for calling, Prime Minister, let me secure the line first and then call you back."!
But the real news is how Mugabe is playing the part of victim convincingly.
Here's what happened.
The president told the Prime Minister that he (The Solution) would have gone to the UN himself, but had decided on sending Joice Mujuru because "it is not wise under the current circumstances for both you and I to be out of the country."
I think the meaning of that statement, which was designed to show Tsvangirai that Mugabe has genuine fears about "hardliners" in his party and their midnight plots, could not have been lost on the Prime Minister.
Let us remind ourselves that this is the man who boarded a plane to Dubai last year in December as soldiers ran riot in the city centre, smashing shop windows and beating black market dealers. Even when the disturbances continued and the whole world was holding its breath, the president did not cut short his trip, did not rush home, strolling in leisurely a few days after the soldiers had been "arrested".
Now he is too afraid to go to the UN, where he was always ready to go in order to give the middle finger to the travel ban imposed on him by the West?
Surely this is put on.
But it is impressive showmanship, is it not?
This comes as Mugabe declared day before yesterday before his party's Central Committee that "the only good imperialist is a dead imperialist".
So now he is wishing death on the very people to whom he is appealing for the lifting of sanctions.
Is this likely to make them more or less amenable to the idea? I think the latter applies.
Add to this the fact that there is now emerging a strong group in ZANU PF that is campaigning for Mugabe to run again as Presidential candidate at the next elections.
Mugabe has been here before. Last time he said, it was up to his party and the people to decide whether he should be their candidate for president or not.
He promptly proceeded to make sure that they decided in the affirmative, hiring mobs to swamp the Conference venue, getting John Nkomo, the chairman to state upfront that this (the December Congress of ZANU PF) was a gathering simply to endorse the candidature of Mugabe.
This time, he will again say it is up to the people. And he will make sure that the people say what he wants them to say.
I am taking bets on whether Mugabe will be ZANU PF's candidate in the next elections next time round. My bet says he will be.